For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 6:23 (HCSB)
Recently, I had a severe case of anger and selfishness. I am the mother of five, and wife to a man that works very long, stressful hours. I have committed my life to caring and serving my family. Sometimes I feel taken advantage of and valued only for the things I can do for them. When I enter this trap, resentment builds and I feel “used” by the ones that are proof of God’s love for me.
I knew what I needed was Truth and a sharp Word. The Lord gave me a Scripture and he immediately showed me the offenses of my sin. It was clear and it was ugly.
My heart broke and I was brought to grief over the shame of what was in my mind and occasionally slipped my tongue. I cried tears of repentance and begged for forgiveness. In my shame, knowing the severity of my wickedness, I knew I deserved a penalty. I asked the Lord if he would be gentle with me and that my consequences would be light. Some days I don’t want to grow anymore.
It was then that I heard him say,
“What consequence have you ever received?”
I get the heart pound that God gives when he wells in me. It is my flesh response to the Spirit.
I have never received any consequences for what I have done. I have made many bad choices over the course of my life and I am regretful because they have caused me, and others, pain. My sin choices have caused unnecessary hurts but I will not receive the ultimate penalty I deserve.
God says the wages of sin is death.
I am still here – Jesus has paid my cost. Not only am I alive, but I have been given the gift of righteousness and eternal life! I will never pay for my wrongdoings. In my wicked state, Jesus chose to take my place. He is my Ransom Forgiveness.
I grow because I understand growth does not come from consequences – it comes from grace and mercy.
Why would I ask for less grace and mercy? Why would anyone ask for less of Jesus?
Instead of asking for less, I pray for more.
Perhaps you are like me –desperately wanting to be the woman God wants you to be. You are harder on yourself than anyone, constantly evaluating your life hour by hour because you know the depths of your heart and mind. If so, remember that Jesus has paid your price and gifted you with what you cannot earn and do not deserve. Turn away from the sin and ask forgiveness from God, and those you offend. Move forward and receive the pardon you have been given. Live fully, with joy, in his grace and mercy until the day you see him face to face.
You are free.
I pray that You Live Like You Know,